Drugged Monkey 17
The night the Weather Hobo died.
We were busy building igloos out of salad bar ham cubes when the distress call came in. The "Evening News Weather Hobo" was in trouble. Apparently years of reporting the latest weather conditions from out in the "Weather Alley" had finally taken their toll. We headed out in hopes of helping the hobo. A couple blocks after we'd left we forgot what we were doing. Ralph was talking about building a car out of ham cubes. I got way too excited about the idea and totally lost my train of thought. Ralph was a genius in the way that only a mirror covered in after-birth can reveal. It was the way mom showed all of us our special qualities. It was tough knowing at an early age that I would be responsible for the big reunion tour. We would create a band and have a huge reunion tour before we ever did anything. Hopefully people would worry they missed us the first time around and we would become huge without ever having done anything previously. The posters read "Returning to Denver for the very first time." Those posters pissed off a lot of people. When the night of the concert came we started the show with a small tribute for the "Evening News Weather Hobo". We projected his picture on the big screen along with some dates we made up for his lifespan. Unfortunately the photo was from a police line-up, but I think everybody felt a little more at peace knowing just how tall that hobo was. The Weather Hobo tribute really set the mood for an incredible evening. It's just too bad we didn't know any songs or play instruments.